I have tried, God knows, I have tried, to ignore the irritating dribble that appears to continuously leak from the offensive mouth of Katie Hopkins. Alas, I have finally given in to my burning desires and opted to write a blog about the woman who, as far as I’m concerned, should find herself single and childless (here’s hoping her family find a more humane owner to take them in) any day now.

For those of you who didn’t see Katie’s monthly dose of bile aired on This Morning recently, you can find a YouTube video for the ‘discussion’ below:

If I’m entirely honest, I’m not sure where to begin. My primal urge, after seeing yet another ridiculous segment featuring this woman, is to launch a nationwide search for her. The first person who captures Hopkins - using a large butterfly net, or other appropriate device - and entrap her within a crate of soil from her own country - please, remember to rest a crucifix on the lid - should be crowned King or Queen of Everything, immediately. 

The truly unfortunate thing about Katie Hopkins - aside from her offensive opinions and general ignorance towards anything that she doesn’t understand - is that she is simply a person who cannot be reasoned with. Which, in case people haven't already been made aware, makes her an arrogant personality who constantly resists the sound of other people’s ideas - never mind the notion that she may actually entertain some of the them for a second. 

The latest battle against Peaches Geldof, which you can view above, shows Katie branding Attachment Parenting as a step away from crap parenting - so I suppose now modern psychology is made up of idiots, too - which prompted outrage from a lot of viewers. However, while every one at home - and people involved with the show - are busy pulling these faces: 

I’m asking why people are even surprised that a woman who thinks it’s okay for a child to spend their birthday alone, also believes it’s okay for a baby to look after itself. 

If you’re willing to take a mature standpoint - which I am obviously not - then the best option is to simply ignore this woman. Yes, she’s ignorant, infuriating and EVERYWHERE, however, while television ratings for programmes that feature her continue to sky-rocket through the ceiling - even if you are only watching out of curiosity - then she’s going to continue getting this airtime, and she’s going to continue offending people; that is, of course, until someone takes my crate idea seriously. I appreciate the irony in my advice that while I’m telling you to pay her less attention, I am ultimately giving her more by writing about her, but for me, it’s been one television appearance too many and a rant was well overdue. 

So from a ginger girl, with an abbreviated name (although, I assure you my Christian name is much more respectable, Katie, if that will add any credibility to this blog post), who was cuddled when she cried as a child, I’m delivering a verbal one-finger salute to you, because frankly, you aren’t worth raising two fingers for. 

C x

PS: Do NOT put Katie Hopkins in a box. That wouldn't be cool and Mad Hatter Reviews would certainly not support that. 

Finally, after years of audiences begging for it; after film producers wondering how they could possibly do justice to such an infamous mythological being; someone, somewhere has managed the impossible! They are, FINALLY, releasing a movie about Vampires…

*note sarcasm above*

Okay, I don’t really know where the fascination came from, but I do feel massively inclined to blame Stephanie Whatshername - responsible for the Twilight series - for the ridiculous influx of Vampire media that has not only hit the cinema screens, but has also hit adolescent bookshelves everywhere in recent years. 

There was a time - cast your minds back to the likes of Dracula - when Vampires were considered to be pretty bad-ass. Far from their now sparkly/vegetarian representation that has, in my opinion, destroyed one of the oldest monsters that most civilisations are familiar with. Everyone knows a Vampire story and, way back when I first heard one, I distinctly remember being pretty scared by them…

There’s always been a bit of a fascination around Vampire culture - the amount of adaptations of Dracula is mind-blowing - but now, it’s just getting boring! What’s even more boring is this social desire that surrounds them. But then, I suppose if you show a group of young girls something that sparkles in the sunlight, it’s a natural reaction for them to coooooo uncontrollably, something that’s worsened by the allegedly attractive Edward Cullen character. 

My first memory of a visual representation of a Vampire was Blade, so it’s hard for me to see where the attraction comes in; although the appearance of Ryan Reynolds in Blade: Trinity nearly tipped the scales for me. 

While I appreciate that Hollywood is merely bowing to the demands of the general public, can they not at least try and jazz up the ideas that they’re using? The Cullens has taken younger - and some older - readers and viewers everywhere by storm and now it seems that every Vampire to appear since these books arrived must be super-attractive, mildly nice and completely misunderstood. Poor things!

By now, you might be wondering what started this rant. See the video below for an explanation: 

VAMPIRE ACADEMY! This will be an actual film, in actual cinemas that people will pay actual money to go and see because they’re actually obsessed by Vampires! It’s madness!

For the first part of the trailer I feel like I’m watching an American version of the likes of Made In Chelsea. With fangs. When you hit the halfway point things take an interesting turn - and I use the word interesting fairly loosely here - as Vampires start showing of their super strength and eternal battle to exist in this world…

Original.

Alright, it might be a good film. There might be worthy fight scenes and amusing moments that redeem it slightly from its completely unoriginal subject matter but c’mon, haven’t we seen enough of this? Isn’t this the time for werewolves or… I don’t know, anything other than Vampires? Get in touch with us and tell your thoughts on the Vampire phenomena… unless you’re going to email me and tell me how Twilight is, in which case, I’d save your fingers the energy. 

 C x